Browse audiobooks narrated by Jessica Almasy, listen to samples and when you're ready head over to Audiobooks.com where you can get 3 FREE audiobooks on us
I crashed the Immortal party and it ended with a surprise encore… a big one. I thought being a Demon sucked, but being a Demon Goddess is a whole ’nother level. Life had been so much easier when I was just a forty-year-old has-been actress trying to make a comeback in the land of Botox and BS. For the love of everything absurd, I was just getting used to being a Demon… and BAM… all of a sudden I’m supposed to be one of the two gals in charge? I mean, being the co-star of the show is great until it involves ruling the Darkness with the evil whack job who destroyed my mother. Pandora is a guiding blight in my world, and I plan to cancel her at all costs. With my Demon love by my side and a gaggle os Immortal nutbags along for the ride, I’ll find the vicious Goddess and put her back in her box. Ah well, fate is set. Destiny is my performance to command. I plan it improv the heck out of it. Go big or go home is my new modus operandi. Although, right now, home sounds seriously appealing. Either way, I’m strapping in and getting ready for the wildest gig yet.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
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I did not order the extra slice of Armageddon to go with my midlife crisis. Apparently, if you’re an Immortal, it comes free of charge. I have until sundown tomorrow to get to a parallel plane of existence, save my family, and kick bad-guy butt all before the world ends. Impossible, right? Not according to my posse of whackado buddies. They like to remind me that nothing is impossible as long as I believe. Well, I’m about to be the mother of all believers. Armed with nothing but a folder titled “Sh*t Pile” and backed by a few fabulous drag queens, a toothpick-chewing nutjob, a sweetheart with a penchant for sharing disgusting facts, and an ice queen who doesn’t play nice with others, we have our work cut out for us. Time is not on my side, and I am having one hell of a midlife crisis.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
Lately, my life has been a big, fat, hairy midlife crisis. I could really go for a boring day or three. Apparently, there’s no rest for the over-forty crowd. Yes, I have fabulous friends.Yes, I have a beautiful baby.Yes, the ghosts are coming back home. Yes, I’m in love with the Grim Reaper. However, that sexy Demon has got some major ’splainin’ to do … like his possible involvement in the shocking kidnapping of my worst and most deadly enemy. With a drag queen and an ice queen as my back up, we’re going to sashay away into the Darkness to find the truth and turn a wrong into a right. Although, I’m learning fast that black and white are often clouded with shades of gray. Whatever. I’m putting on my rose-colored glasses and going for it. I plan to live midlife in peace … not pieces. Good luck to me.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
Midlife is supposed to be messy, but this is a full-on catastrophic crisis. Just when I thought life might be getting back to normal—normal being a relative word—I couldn’t have been more wrong. Marriage proposal from the Grim Reaper? Yes.Beautiful healthy baby? Yes.Friends and family safe? Yes.Ghost of my worst enemy sitting on my front porch? OMG. Yep. With the ghostly world imploding around me, I’m going to need more than superglue to repair it. Question? Am I willing to do what has to be done?Answer? I’m about to find out. To say forty has been an eventful year is an understatement. On the contrary, it’s turning out to be a seriously hard-knock midlife.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
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Reclaiming Body Trust: A Path to Healing & Liberation
A holistic and powerful framework for accepting and liberating our bodies, and ourselves. Have you ever felt uncomfortable or not "at home" in your body? In this book, the founders of Body Trust, licensed therapist Hilary Kinavey and registered dietician Dana Sturtevant, invite readers to break free from the status quo and reject a diet culture that has taken advantage and profited from trauma, stigma, and disembodiment, and fully reclaim and embrace their bodies. Informed by the personal body stories of the hundreds of people they have worked with, Reclaiming Body Trust delineates an intersectional, social justice−orientated path to healing in three phases: The Rupture, The Reckoning, and The Reclamation. Throughout, readers will be anchored by the authors' innovative and revolutionary Body Trust framework to discover a pathway out of a rigid, mechanistic way of thinking about the body and into a more authentic, sustainable way to occupy and nurture our bodies.
Dana Sturtevant, Hilary Kinavey (Author), Angela Braxton-Johnson, Eileen Stevens, Hilary Kinavey, Jessica Almasy, Nicky Endres (Narrator)
Audiobook
What does a forty-year-old former child star do when she finds out she’s a Demon? A sitcom, of course. Age is just a number unless you’re an actress of a certain age trying to make a comeback in La La Land. Back in the day, I was the child star of the hit show Camp Bites. Today, I’m still living it down. After a disastrous soap opera audition and getting fired from a TV show for not having a bodacious enough backside, one would think I’d be smart enough to go into real estate. Nope. Just found out from the rudest, meanest, and hottest guy alive that I’m a Demon. The jerk, also a Demon, goes by the name Abaddon—Abe to his friends. I call him Dick. He’s come from the Underworld to protect me—insert laugh track—since there’s a bounty on my head. Dick is not a welcome addition to my midlife madness. However, he won’t go away, and now he’s my new boss. Fine. Whatever. All I ever wanted to do in my life was pretend. I can pretend to get along with Dick. I can pretend that I’m not wildly attracted to him. Not sure I can pretend I’m human anymore, or that a supernatural assassin isn’t trying to cancel me, but I’m going to fake it until I make it. Or I get killed. As the Underworld turns upside down, so have the days of my life.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
A forty-something Werewolf supermodel, five supernaturally screwed up bridesmaids, and a demonic mother of the groom determined to ruin the wedding. Awesome … not. How has my life come to this? Not sure who I screwed over in a past life to end up with a heinous mother-in-law who thinks my wedding is for her. If I didn’t love Chance more than myself—which is a lot—I’d rethink the entire hot mess. Problem—I’ve been instructed to show up in Hell on my wedding day with six bridesmaids. I have exactly two friends in total. The punishment for failure? Electrocution—which would suck. Problem Solve—Go to a supernatural plasticware party at the community center and blackmail a few gals into being bridesmaids. New Problem—The gals I coerced bring their own brand of crazy to the party. Whatever. Chance is the Demon of my dreams. He loves me fur and all. One night of Hell for a lifetime of happiness is a good trade. I hope … Move over, Bridezilla. I’ve got this covered. Welcome to my big fat hairy wedding.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
Midlife is sheer madness, and the facts of midlife are not taught in school. Unfortunately, some lessons are hellishly hard to learn. I thought I had it figured out. I was wrong. Proving I’m the Angel of Mercy is turning into a sh*tshow of epic proportions. Not too long ago, I was a forty-year-old gal with a stable and boring life ahead of me. Now? Not so much. I have celestial siblings who are no walk in the park. Their decisions can destroy my future. And of course, my predecessor has given me a month to do the impossible or I’ll lose everything that means anything to me. Gluing ghosts back together is turning out to be the easiest part of my job. Fine. If this is my fate, I accept. Nothing is impossible if you believe. I choose to believe.
Robyn Peterman (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
This middle grade debut is Sleeping Beauty like you've never seen it before, about a girl who lives in the shadow of her older sister and the curse that has haunted her from birth. For years, Briony has lived in the shadow of her beautiful older sister, Rosalin, and the curse that has haunted her from birth--that on the day of her sixteenth birthday she would prick her finger on a spindle and cause everyone in the castle to fall into a 100-year sleep. When the day the curse is set to fall over the kingdom finally arrives, nothing--not even Briony--can stop its evil magic. You know the story. But here's something you don't know. When Briony finally wakes up, it's up to her to find out what's really going on, and to save her family and friends from the murderous Thornwood. But who is going to listen to her? This is a story of sisterhood, of friendship, and of the ability of even little sisters to forge their own destiny. The first in a three-book series of fairy tale retellings, these are the stories of the siblings who never made it into the storybook.
Leah Cypess (Author), Jessica Almasy (Narrator)
Audiobook
Hilo Book 8: Gina and the Big Secret
'An action-packed page turner with heart!' --Dav Pilkey, author of DOG MAN Your favorite characters are BACK and on an EPIC quest to save the world in the newest book in the New York Times bestselling graphic novel series that kids and critics love! There's a NEW Earth! The world's timeline has been turned upside down, and now magical creatures are EVERYWHERE. Gina has to fix things--FAST! With DJ and HILO's help, can Gina find the key to turn the world back to what it was? Find out in Hilo 8--a laugh-out-loud, action-packed adventure filled with epic battles! True friendship! Good jokes! Bad jokes! Giant (hilarious) monsters! Spoiled royals! Prophecies! Good! Evil! And much, much more!
Judd Winick (Author), Bahni Turpin, Em Grosland, Hillary Huber, Jessica Almasy, Jessie Cannizzaro, Joshua Kane, Kathleen Mcinerney, Maggie-Meg Reed, Michael Crouch, Minka Wiltz, Phil Lamarr, Quincy Surasmith, Yuuki Luna (Narrator)
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Minecraft: Mob Squad: Never Say Nether: An Official Minecraft Novel
The Mob Squad enters a whole new dimension of danger in this official Minecraft novel! Things are changing in the town of Cornucopia. The mighty wall that kept the townsfolk sealed off from the outside world is wide open, and the world beyond beckons with the promise of new adventures. The Mob Squad were heroes not so long ago, but the adults are still in charge, and to them, even the most heroic kid is still just a kid. The Mob Squad's leader, Mal, is still milking cows and dreaming of the next adventure. Their sharp-eyed archer Lenna is learning everything she can about the Overworld, but the horizon is still far away. Fearless warrior Chug is running a store with his brother, but his reputation for breaking stuff has some folks still calling him a bad apple. And his inventive brother, Tok . . . Wait, where did Tok go?! When the fourth member of the Mob Squad vanishes in the night, along with most of the town's potions, Cornucopia's elders think they're dealing with a runaway thief. But Tok wouldn't just leave without saying anything. And there's no way he's a potion thief! There's something far more dangerous going on here. And if they're going to stop it, Mal, Lenna, and Chug are on their own. Except, that is, for the one Cornucopian they least want to bring along: Jarro, the worst bully in the Overworld. But if they're going to find Tok, they can't just be three best friends and one total jerk. They're going to need to learn how to work together all over again-because this is an adventure that can be accomplished only by the Mob Squad!
Delilah S. Dawson (Author), Barrett Leddy, Jamie K. Brown, Jessica Almasy, Keylor Leigh, Michael Crouch (Narrator)
Audiobook
Max and the Midknights: The Tower of Time
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING SERIES • From the creator of the Big Nate series comes the third Max and the Midknights adventure! 'Fantastic! I loved it!' --Dav Pilkey, New York Times bestselling author of the Dog Man series Everyone's favorite knight-in-training is back...to back! Max's twin is public enemy number one, and it's up to the Midknights to find her before time runs out! But dangers loom, including bloodthirsty trolls, murderous pirates, and even a ruthless king--or two. Can Max and her band of loyal friends unlock the mystery of her past? Lincoln Peirce pens another epic quest in The Tower of Time, book three in the New York Times bestselling Max & the Midknights series.
Lincoln C. Peirce, Lincoln Peirce (Author), Christopher Gebauer, Dion Graham, Fred Berman, James Fouhey, January Lavoy, Jessica Almasy, Kevin R. Free, Kristen Dimercurio, Marc Thompson, Michael Crouch, Nicole Lewis, Sean Kenin Elias-Reyes (Narrator)
Audiobook
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