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Audiobooks Narrated by Ellie Kemper
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Following in the tradition of J. K. Rowling and Roald Dahl, Kimmy Schmidt is an exciting new voice in middle-grade fantasy adventure. This debut will change the way boys and girls everywhere see the world -- and each other!
Penn dreads the day that he will start to become a monster, but it's inevitable. The youngest of his tribe in Greemulax, he knows that as boys become men, they turn into powerful, hairy blue creatures called Grabagorns, and that their solemn vow is to never again be weak.
Legend has it that dragons all but destroyed Greemulax years ago during a terrible time known as the Great Scorch. Not one of the tight-knit community's girls or women survived, and the men, ruled by Grabagorn Prime, have lived in mourning and anger ever since. But when one of Penn's dragon traps catches a real live girl named Kristy, he starts to question everything he thought was true.
Together, Penn and Kristy set off on an adventure that will take them to a tugboat in a tree and through a treacherous lake of pudding, toward a candy forest guarded by dragons that might hold the answers they seek. The more time they spend with each other, however, the faster Penn transforms into the monster he fears, and the more Kristy seems to fade away into nothing. Can they reach their destination before it's too late?
Comedian and star of The Office and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Ellie Kemper delivers a hilarious and uplifting collection of essays about one pale woman's journey from Midwestern naïf to Hollywood semi-celebrity to outrageously reasonable New Yorker.
There comes a time in every sitcom actress's life when she is faced with the prospect of writing a book. When Ellie Kemper's number was up, she was ready. Contagiously cheerful, predictably wholesome, and mostly inspiring except for one essay about her husband's feet, My Squirrel Days is a funny, free-wheeling tour of Ellie's life—from growing up in suburban St. Louis with a vivid imagination and a crush on David Letterman to moving to Los Angeles and accidentally falling on Doris Kearns Goodwin.
But those are not the only famous names dropped in this synopsis. Ellie will also share stories of inadvertently insulting Ricky Gervais at the Emmy Awards, telling Tina Fey that she has "great hair—really strong and thick," and offering a maxi pad to Steve Carell. She will take you back to her childhood as a nature lover determined to commune with squirrels, to her college career as a benchwarming field hockey player with no assigned position, and to her young professional days writing radio commercials for McDonald's but never getting paid. Ellie will guide you along her journey through adulthood, from unorganized bride to impatient wife to anxious mother who—as recently observed by a sassy hairstylist—"dresses like a mom." Well, sassy hairstylist, Ellie Kemper is a mom. And she has been dressing like it since she was four.
Ellie has written for GQ, Esquire, The New York Times, McSweeney's, and The Onion. Her voice is the perfect antidote to the chaos of modern life. In short, she will tell you nothing you need to know about making it in show business, and everything you need to know about discreetly changing a diaper at a Cibo Express.
