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Audiobooks Narrated by Christopher John Fetherolf
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BURYING THE PAST IS EASIER SAID THAN DONE.
Ed Vesser feels trapped by his life - literally. He's being held prisoner by a would-be world conqueror. All he wants is to escape back to his fiancé, assuming she doesn't dump his ass when she finds out he's a vampire.
Serena Taylor's a witch with a knack for technomancy - using her magic to help deliver unreal profit margins. Too bad she'll need to put in some overtime thanks to long-lost dryads and undead goons breathing down her neck.
Now they're both stuck deep beneath Boston, exploring the ruins of a former vamp stronghold. She's looking to walk away with intel on the burgeoning vampire nation. He's simply hoping to walk away. Neither's going to be easy, especially once they realize they're not alone.
When ancient evil stirs, Ed and Serena will discover they have one thing in common - a burning desire ... to stay alive as they learn that some secrets were meant to stay buried.
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. NOW HE MUST BECOME ONE OF THEM.
Bill Ryder has a powerful destiny. He just never expected it to involve an amnesiac bloodsucker, a bunch of D&D dorks, and a hormonal witch. It’s time for the gamer, geek, and legendary vampire to embrace his fate. Ordered to storm the vampire stronghold in Boston, Bill must approach the doorstep of the invincible undead warlord he’s destined to face. It’s his only chance of stopping Armageddon.
As his enemies stand in his way and his allies falter, the vicious beast inside of him wants out. If he stands tall and faces his fate, the world might just have a chance of surviving. If he fails, an unquenchable evil will destroy everything Bill knows and loves.
Why can’t the end of the world ever be easy?
The Wicked Dead is the seventh book in the bestselling Tome of Bill saga, a vampire comedy series with a nasty overbite. If you like bloody fight scenes, geeky in-jokes, and breakneck-paced action, then you'll love Rick Gualtieri's latest installment in the perfect vampire series for the 21st century adult.
Buy The Wicked Dead to watch this nerdy vamp fight for his life today!
The complete Tome of Bill series order:
Bill the Vampire (book 1)
Scary Dead Things (book 2)
The Mourning Woods (book 3)
Holier Than Thou (book 4)
Sunset Strip (series adventure)
Goddamned Freaky Monsters (book 5)
Half A Prayer (book 6)
The Wicked Dead (book 7)
Shining Fury (series adventure)
The Last Coven (book 8)
THERE ARE REASONS PEOPLE FEAR THE DARK. BILL RYDER ISN’T ONE OF THEM.
This omnibus edition contains the first FOUR novels of the bestselling Tome of Bill series – over 1000 pages of urban fantasy with a nasty overbite.
Gamer, Geek, and Legendary Vampire – Bill Ryder is an unlikely hero trying to survive in a world of undead horrors. Despite awesome powers, loyal allies, and a Brooklyn-sized attitude; the odds are stacked heavily against him. Bill must fulfill his destiny and save the world from the ancient terrors that threaten it – all while trying to build some semblance of a social life.
BILL THE VAMPIRE
Bill Ryder was a dateless geek until he met a girl to die for. So he did. Unfortunately for him, that was just the beginning of his troubles. H
SCARY DEAD THINGS
One of the most powerful vampires in the world wants Bill Ryder’s head. A pint-sized princess wants the rest of him. It’s just not clear which fate is worse.
THE MOURNING WOODS
A war is brewing between vampires and sasquatches, ancient enemies from the dawn of time. If it can’t be stopped, the veil will be lifted and all of humanity’s darkest nightmares will be unleashed to wreak havoc.
HOLIER THAN THOU
On the eve of war, The Icon – legendary slayer of the vampire race – has arisen. There’s just one small catch: Bill Ryder is in love with her. Panic is about to break out within the ranks of the undead and Bill is caught smack dab in the middle of it.
Join Bill Ryder in these tales full of monsters, mayhem, and foul-mouthed laughs.
If you enjoy The Dresden Files or The Iron Druid Chronicles, then you’re in for a bloody good time!
TERROR LURKS BELOW AND IT’S ABOUT TO SURFACE.
The end of the world is rapidly approaching, but Bill Ryder – gamer, geek, and legendary vampire – finds himself with more pressing concerns to worry about: the women in his life. Sidelined from action, he’s forced to reevaluate his feelings. Sadly for him, it’s a luxury he can ill afford.
An unstoppable terror from the dawn of time has awoken deep beneath the Earth and is headed his way. To make matters worse, he’s been deemed a traitor by those he thought to be his allies. Now he finds himself fighting off enemies from all sides while warring with his emotions. Talk about sucky timing for introspection.
As the world crumbles to pieces around him, Bill must muster his courage, master his powers, and rise to the destiny he’s been trying so long to deny – because if he doesn’t, his love life will be the least of his worries.
Half A Prayer, book six in the Tome of Bill urban fantasy series, is a kick-ass paranormal adventure by bestselling author Rick Gualtieri.
If you're a fan of Shayne Silvers, jim Butcher, John P Logsdon, or Kevin Hearne, then you're in for a bloody good time with this hilarious vampire comedy series.
The complete Tome of Bill series order:
Bill the Vampire (book 1)
Scary Dead Things (book 2)
The Mourning Woods (book 3)
Holier Than Thou (book 4)
Sunset Strip (series adventure)
Goddamned Freaky Monsters (book 5)
Half A Prayer (book 6)
The Wicked Dead (book 7)
Shining Fury (series adventure)
The Last Coven (book 8)
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. NOW HE’S TRYING TO STOP THEM.
Three months have passed since the fateful encounter in New York City that ended with the disappearance of Bill Ryder – gamer, geek, and legendary vampire. Now he’s back – reawakened halfway across the globe with no allies, clothing, or clue as to how he got there. The only thing he’s certain of is that his captors plan to use him for their own nefarious ends and don’t care how much blood they spill in the process.
Escape might be the least of his worries, though. Civilization teeters on the brink of chaos. Mythical beasts, once thought the stuff of fantasy, are breaking through the veil, intent on waging war against mankind. At their forefront stands an ancient evil, the last remnant of a people thought long dead, and it’s about to cut a swath of destruction through the world not seen since biblical times.
Bill’s only chance is to reclaim his life, reconcile with his friends, and muster every bit of attitude he can – because if he fails, Hell on Earth will become far more than just another corny saying.
Goddamned Freaky Monsters, book five in the bestselling Tome of Bill series, is a hard-hitting vampire comedy from bestselling author Rick Gualtieri.
If you're a fan of The Nate Temple Series, The Dresden Files, The Rebellion Chronicles, or The Montague & Strong Case Files, then you're in for a bloody good time with this hilarious urban fantasy series.
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE’S NOT ONE OF THEM.
Dateless dork Bill Ryder never suspected it would take death to make his life a hell of a lot more interesting, but then he met a girl to die for – so he did.
Now he’s a vampire, surrounded by creatures stronger, deadlier, and much cooler than he is. They’re giving him just ninety days to prove he has what it takes to be an apex predator of the night, assuming he doesn’t give them a reason to dust his ass sooner.
Bill isn’t exactly average, though. A vamp like him hasn’t been seen in centuries. He’s got a few tricks up his sleeve, unexpected allies, and an attitude that makes him too obnoxious to quit. Good thing, too, because he’ll need all the help he can get if he doesn’t want to end up even deader than last time.
Join him in this hilarious tale of bloodthirsty monsters, gory mishaps, and an unlikely hero who, fangs or not, is still at the bottom of the food chain.
Bill The Vampire is book one of The Tome of Bill, the quintessential vampire comedy series.
If you're a fan of Shayne Silvers, Steve McHugh, Michael Anderle, Jim Butcher, or What We Do in the Shadows then you're in for a bloody good time with this side-splitting tale of horror comedy.
Note: This book contains violence, gore, crude humor, and enough four-letter words to fill a dump truck.
The complete Tome of Bill series order:
Bill the Vampire (book 1)
Scary Dead Things (book 2)
The Mourning Woods (book 3)
Holier Than Thou (book 4)
Sunset Strip (series adventure)
Goddamned Freaky Monsters (book 5)
Half A Prayer (book 6)
The Wicked Dead (book 7)
Shining Fury (series adventure)
The Last Coven (book 8)
Also be sure to check out the sequel series - Bill of the Dead.
Jack Walker journeyed halfway around the world and completed his daring rescue. He must now return home, traversing a world filled with endless hordes of night runners; the genetically altered, ferocious species that now inhabit the dark recesses left over from the demise of mankind and now dominate the planet. The only things more dominate are the billions of corpses left to rot where they died. It is through this world that Jack must use his special forces training to lead a small group of survivors back home to where there is the faint hope of sanctuary. His training is pushed to the limits as he is confronted with situation after situation coming face to face with the night runners. He must walk that delicate, fine edge between action and keeping his kids out of harm's way; between taking risks and turning away as he continues his quest for survival. Never having walked away from risky situations, Jack must now carefully weigh his decisions as the stakes are much higher. His kids' very safety hangs in the balance, along with the safety of the few remaining survivors. This gripping, action-packed tale tells Jack's story of survival in a post-apocalyptic world filled with peril. Safety is the dream. Nightmare is the reality. A nightmare where danger lurks around every corner.
THERE ARE REASONS THE UNDEAD FEAR THE NIGHT.
Bill Ryder – gamer, geek, and legendary vampire – has woman troubles. The girl he wants is deadly to him. The girl who wants him is deadly to everyone else. He’s trapped in the most lethal love triangle he can imagine and it’s only going to get worse.
On the eve of war, The Icon – ancient foe of the vampire race – has arisen. Panic is about to break out within the undead ranks and Bill is caught smack dab in the middle of it. Destiny has placed them on a cataclysmic collision course, but there’s just one small catch: he’s in love with her.
Now he finds himself in a race against supernatural assassins to save the person fated to destroy him. Talk about being damned if you do.
Unsure of his allies and outnumbered by enemies, Bill must dig deep within himself and find the faith to succeed – because if he fails, it’ll be more than just his social life in tatters.
Holier Than Thou, book four in the bestselling Tome of Bill urban fantasy series, is a paranormal dance with death, destiny, and trying to get a date.
If you're a fan of Shayne Silvers, jim Butcher, Domino Finn, or Kevin Hearne, then you're in for a bloody good time with this hilarious vampire comedy series.
Jack, a sometimes humorous, sometimes philosophical ex-special operations pilot and soldier is one of the few left to struggle through the desolation left in the aftermath; seeking to survive as a new ferocious species emerges from the rubble, hungry and unrelenting. Will his special forces training be enough? Will he be able to keep his children safe and guide the few survivors through perils that now roam the world they once knew? Or will the hordes that now own the night prevail, forever removing the last of mankind from existence? Humankind was once at the top of the food chain. But that has now changed.
THREE WORDS: VAMPIRES VERSUS SASQUATCH.
Bill Ryder – gamer, geek, and legendary vampire – is back in his wildest adventure yet.
A war is brewing between ancient enemies from the dawn of time. If it can’t be stopped, the veil will be lifted and all of humanity’s darkest nightmares will be unleashed to wreak havoc. Bill and his friends are the only chance we have – Lord help us all!
The leaders of the vampire nation dispatch Bill to a faraway land in order to broker peace with an army of angry Sasquatches, but it’s not going to be easy. His enemies want him dead. Hell, some of his allies do too. Danger lurks at every turn and in places where he least expects it.
Now he must rely on his friends, master his fledgling powers, and use every four-letter word in his vocabulary to stop the war, uncover the conspiracy, and solve the mystery that lies at the heart of the Mourning Woods.
The Mourning Woods, book three in the bestselling Tome of Bill horror comedy series, is a hilarious adventure tale that will trample your funny bone like an angry moose.
If you're a fan of The Dresden Files, The Nate Temple Series, The Rebellion Chronicles, or The Montague & Strong Case Files, then you're in for a bloody good time with the Tome of Bill - the quintessential vampire comedy series.
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE STILL ISN’T ONE OF THEM.
Bill Ryder, the trash-talking geek from Bill the Vampire, is back and about to find himself in a whole new world of side-splitting insanity.
One of the most powerful vampires on the planet wants Bill’s head. A crazed immortal princess wants the rest of him. It’s a toss-up which fate is worse.
All the while, new and powerful forces have begun to emerge from the shadows around him. Are they friend or foe? Knowing his luck, do you even have to ask?
Bill’s only hope for survival is to marshal his friends, master his powers, and somehow prove that, in a world of supernatural terrors, he’s the scariest dead thing of them all.
Scary Dead Things is book two of the Tome of Bill, the quintessential vampire comedy series.
