Essays & Memoirs Audiobooks | Comedy

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football: The NFL's Greatest Players, Plays, Scandals, and Screw

Celebrated sports commentator Dan Patrick and comedy writer Joel H. Cohen team up with some of the hilarious creatives behind The Simpsons, Saturday Night Live, Modern Family, The Big Bang Theory, Late Night with Conan O’Brien, and more to tell you everything—and nothing—about America’s favorite sport!** **No, not darts—pro football.

Dan Patrick, Joel H. Cohen (Author), Dan Patrick (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Snake Has All The Lines

The #1 New York Times bestselling author of Please Don't Eat the Daisies offers another hilarious look at home life, show business, and more. Jean Kerr played many roles in her life, from exasperated mother to Broadway playwright and keen observer of mid-twentieth century suburbia. She also became one of America's most beloved humorists by sharing her insights and anecdotes in a series of popular newspaper columns. In The Snake Has All the Lines, Kerr explores topics ranging from family vacations and modern convenience to the trials and tribulations of opening a new play. With her inimitable wit, she reminds us that while life may be a day at the beach, a day at the beach with small children can have you questioning your life choices in no time.

Jean Kerr (Author), Teri Schnaubelt (Narrator)

Audiobook

[Norwegian Bokmål] - Fortellinger for tøysekopper

Fortellinger for tøysekopper og annet godtfolk er en samling med sju små, morsomme, eventyrlige og fantasifulle historier for barn og voksne. De sju fortellingene er: Hans Høytidelighet Hanen av Hønsegården, Påskeharen Petra som falt i hullet, Mads og det mugne gjørmemonsteret, Skogmusen, heksen og de tre ønskene, Pinnsvinet Pelle med de myke piggene, Ellen Enhjørnings første skoledag og Min mormor sier mjau. www.munay.no

Anne-Lene Bleken (Author), Anne-Lene Bleken (Narrator)

Audiobook

I'd Rather Not

From one of Australia's most wryly funny writers comes an original and utterly hilarious memoir of reaching for the stars while lying in a ditch. Quiet Quitting. The Great Resignation. Sometimes a literary sensibility catches the spirit of the times. In I'd Rather Not, Robert Skinner has it all covered. This wonderful audiobook of adventures (and misadventures) in theart of living is wryly subversive and constantly hilarious. It is about work, escape and that something more we all need. 'I was sleeping in what might reasonably be described as a ditch, though I tried not tothink of it in those terms for morale reasons ...' Robert Skinner arrives in the city, searching for a richer life. Things begin badly and then, surprisingly, get slightly worse. Pretty soon he's sleeping rough and trying to run a literary magazine out of a dog park. His quest for meaning keeps being thwarted, by gainful employment, beagles, house parties, ill-advised love affairs, camel trips and bureaucratic entanglements. I'd Rather Not is a deeply funny book of light and shade, triumph and misadventure,where the wisdom is hard-won and promptly forgotten. Yet even when his ventures fail, Robert Skinner succeeds, always, in delighting listeners. For fans of Sloane C rosley, Andrew Sean Greer, Nathan Fielder and David Sedaris.

Robert Skinner (Author), Robert Skinner (Narrator)

Audiobook

Everybody's Favorite: Tales from the World’s Worst Perfectionist

“Many have tried, and many will try, to capture the sweet, innocent insanity of life as a young girl during the ’90s and 2000s. None have come close to the comedic perfection Lillian Stone nails again and again in Everybody’s Favorite.” —Glamour, Best Nonfiction Books of 2023 From one of the Internet’s favorite self-deprecating commentators comes Everybody’s Favorite, a laugh-out-loud essay collection that tackles the relentless pursuit of perfection while navigating growing up in the early 2000s. Lillian Stone—childhood evangelical, AOL girlfriend, and professional nail biter is always living on the edge of anxiety. From the pitfalls of a girl plagued by religious trauma, the incomprehensible yet unforgiving need for perfection, and a poorly-behaved twenty-pound beagle, Everybody’s Favorite is a refreshing story of what it means to pick yourself when the world is telling you otherwise. Still navigating the ins and outs of adulthood, accompanied by an obsessive-compulsive disorder that’s become an exercise in self-acceptance and thus compassion, Lillian has become an expert in fighting the urge to be someone else’s idea of perfect. In this laugh-out-loud essay collection, replete with cringe-inducing touchstones of an early-aughts girlhood, Lillian Stone recounts her quest to be everybody’s favorite. Set largely during the early 2000s Ozarks, and peppered with Stone’s biting satire and gloriously self-deprecating personal anecdotes, Everybody’s Favorite is a wry, empathetic look at the chaos that ensues when we contort ourselves into an ever-changing assortment of socially acceptable shapes —only to fall out of place, twist an ankle, pee your pants a little, and realize that the pursuit of perfection isn’t really all that interesting.

Lillian Stone (Author), Brittany Pressley (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Psychology of Elden Ring: Arise Now, Ye Tarnished

'Oh, arise now, ye Tarnished. Ye dead, who let live. The call of long-lost grace speaks to us all.' ~ Opening Cutscene, Elden Ring 'The Psychology of Elden Ring' offers a deep dive into the captivating world of Elden Ring, exploring the game's rich psychological themes and implications. This insightful book is packed with fascinating analysis, research, and theories that will appeal to both gamers and psychology enthusiasts alike. Through this book, readers will: - Discover the intricate relationship between the game's story, characters, and environments and how they shape the player's emotions and thoughts. - Explore the game's intricate narrative and its commentary on themes such as identity, morality, and human nature. - Learn about the psychological concepts and theories that underpin the game's design and how they impact the player's experience. - Gain insights into how the game's challenging gameplay mechanics and difficulty can affect players' emotions and motivations. - Discover how Elden Ring's unique world design and immersive storytelling create an unforgettable and emotionally resonant gaming experience. 'The Psychology of Elden Ring' is a must-read for any gamer interested in understanding the psychological underpinnings of one of the most highly anticipated games of all time. This book offers a rare glimpse into the creative process behind Elden Ring and provides an engaging, thought-provoking analysis of the game's psychological impact on players.

Anthony Bean, Ph.D. (Author), Erik Lawrence (Narrator)

Audiobook

Tough Titties: On Living Your Best Life When You're the F-ing Worst

From award-winning TV writer Laura Belgray, a hilarious collection of full-body-cringe, watch-through-your-fingers life lessons her own husband calls "loser Sex and the City." What does it take to grow up cool and popular, master adulthood, fast track your success, and always be your best? Laura Belgray wouldn't know. Her wildly relatable coming-of-age stories include hate-following her 6th grade bully on social media decades later; moving home post-college to measure her self-worth in hookups with Upper West Side bartenders; dating a sociopathic man-baby; proving herself in the early '90s at New York's coolest magazine (as the world's worst intern); falling for get-rich-quick schemes on the Internet; and, most of all, saying "tough titties" to the supposed-to's in life: driving a car, being on time, handing in your paperwork, learning to roast a chicken, and having kids. Peppered with cutting insights on our confusing, self-helpy culture that calls hair removal "self care" and tells us to give our 110% but also to give zero f*cks, Tough Titties will leave you feeling better about, well, everything. Let's face it: we're all tired of shame-spiraling after being told what to do when we know we're not going to do any of it. Tough Titties is one big permission slip to be a dork, a sometimes-unspiritual slacker, a late bloomer and, ultimately, 100% yourself. It'll also have you snort-laughing in public and tapping whoever's nearby to say, "Lemme read you one more part!" Which is annoying, but tough titties. "Nobody makes me laugh like Laura Belgray. She's got a one-of-a kind knack for taking the shame out of life's most humiliating moments. Tough Titties is a hilarious, must-read permission slip to be 100% you." - Marie Forleo, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Everything is Figureoutable

Laura Belgray (Author), Laura Belgray (Narrator)

Audiobook

Kiss Me in the Coral Lounge: Intimate Confessions from a Happy Marriage

Even twenty years into marriage, Helen Ellis's husband still makes her heart pitter patter. The New York Times bestselling author paints a portrait of true romance for our times in these surprising, sexy, and hilariously frank essays about love, marriage, and her last first kiss. 'Ellis is one of our greatest living humorists, in the same league as Sedaris and Irby...A fascinating portrait of middle-aged love." -Ann Napolitano, New York Times bestselling author of Dear Edward Welcome to the Coral Lounge, a room in Helen Ellis's New York City apartment painted such an exuberant shade that a Peeping Tom left a sticky note asking for the color. It is in the Coral Lounge where all the parties happen: A game called "What's in the box?" makes its uproarious debut, the Puzzle Posse pounces on a 500-piece jigsaw of a beheaded priest, and guests don blindfolds for a raucous bridal shower. When the pandemic shuts down the city, the Coral Lounge becomes a place of refuge, where Helen and her husband binge-watch Joan Collins's Dynasty, dote on two spoiled cats, and where Helen discovers that even twenty years into marriage, her husband still makes her heart pitter patter.

Helen Ellis (Author), Helen Ellis (Narrator)

Audiobook

Map Addict: The Bestselling Tale of an Obsession

'My name is Mike and I am a map addict. There, it's said…' Maps not only show the world, they help it turn. On an average day, we will consult some form of map approximately a dozen times, often without even noticing: checking the A-Z, the road atlas or the Sat Nav, scanning the tube or bus map, a quick Google online or hours wasted flying over a virtual Earth, navigating a way around a shopping centre, watching the weather forecast, planning a walk or a trip, catching up on the news, booking a holiday or hotel. Maps pepper logos, advertisements, illustrations, books, web pages and newspaper and magazine articles: they are a cipher for every area of human existence. At a stroke, they convey precise information about topography, layout, history, politics and power. They are the unsung heroes of life: Map Addict sings their song. There are some fine, dry tomes out there about the history and development of cartography: this is not one of them. Map Addict mixes wry observation with hard fact and considerable research, unearthing the offbeat, the unusual and the downright pedantic in a celebration of all things maps. In Map Addict, we learn the location of what has officially been named by the OS as the most boring square kilometre in the land; we visit the town fractured into dozens of little parcels of land split between two different countries and trek around many other weird borders of Britain and Europe; we test the theories that the new city of Milton Keynes was built to a pagan alignment and that women can't read maps. Combining history, travel, politics, memoir and oblique observation in a highly readable, and often very funny, style, Mike Parker confesses how his own impressive map collection was founded on a virulent teenage shoplifting habit, ponders how a good leftie can be so gung-ho about British cartographic imperialism and wages a one-man war against the moronic blandishments of the Sat Nav age.

Mike Parker (Author), Mike Parker (Narrator)

Audiobook

It Was an Ugly Couch Anyway: And Other Thoughts on Moving Forward

Read by the author. A collection of refreshingly honest and hilarious essays from Southern Living columnist Elizabeth Passarella about navigating change--whether emotional or logistical--and staying sane during life's unexpected twists and turns. After Elizabeth Passarella and her husband finally decided that it was time to sell their two-bedroom apartment in Manhattan, she found herself wondering, Is there a proper technique for skinning a couch? The couch in question was a beloved hand-me-down from her father--who had recently passed away--and she was surprisingly reluctant to let the nine-foot, plaid, velour-covered piece of furniture go. So, out came the scissors. She kept the fabric and tossed the couch. We've all had to make decisions in our lives about what to keep and what to toss--habits, attitudes, friends, even homes. In this new collection of essays, Elizabeth explores the ups and downs of moving forward--both emotionally and logistically--with her welcome candor and sense of humor that readers have come to love. She enters into a remarkable (and strange) relationship with an elderly neighbor whose apartment she hopes to buy, examines her own stubborn stances on motherhood and therapy, and tries to come to terms with a family health crisis that brings more questions than answers. Along the way Elizabeth reminds readers that when they feel stuck or their load feels heavy, there is always light breaking in somewhere. It Was an Ugly Couch Anyway will make readers laugh, cry, and feel a little less alone as they navigate their own lives that are filled with uncertainty, change, and things beyond their control.

Elizabeth Passarella (Author), Elizabeth Passarellla (Narrator)

Audiobook

Delight

‘An exquisitely-written, generous, funny, thoughtful book about the everyday joys of being alive. I love it.’ Dolly Alderton ‘J. B. Priestley is one of our literary icons of the 20th Century and it is time that we all became re-acquainted with his genius.’ Dame Judi Dench ‘My apology, my little bit of penitence, for having grumbled so much, for having darkened the breakfast table, almost ruined the lunch, nearly silence the dinner party, for all the fretting and chafing, grousing and croaking, for the old glum look and the thrust-out lower lip. So my long-suffering kinsfolk, my patient friends, may a glimmer of that delight which has so often possessed me, but perhaps too frequently in secret, now reach you from these pages.’ There are times when there doesn’t seem much to smile about. And for those times, there is this book. J. B Priestley’s 1949 classic teaches us that joy may be found in even the simplest things, and that we all have the capacity to appreciate them. Delight comprises a series of short essays, all focussing on a single simple pleasure, from reading detective stories in bed to smoking a pipe in the bath; from ‘Cosy planning’ to the earliest summer mornings; and from mineral water in the bedrooms of foreign hotels to the smell of bacon in the morning. Combining poignant memories of his childhood with glimpses of his interior world, panoramas of life abroad with thoughts about writing, music, theatre – some strictly personal, some universal –this highly readable book bursts with humour and literary flare on every page.

J. B. Priestley (Author), Sean Baker (Narrator)

Audiobook

Near Death By A Thousand Cuts: A Humorous Memoir Of Misfortune

Pregnant and dealing with a bout of morning sickness, Andrew Butters' soon-to-be mom handed the keys to her car to her husband and asked him to start it up. He cranked the engine and released the clutch, not realizing it was still in gear. The car lurched forward, striking her in the caboose and launching her into the ditch. Thus began her unborn son's adventures in misfortune. Told in the style of a friend at the pub recounting a tall tale that begins, 'Have I told you about the time...,' Near Death by a Thousand Cuts takes you on a wild and crazy forty-eight-year journey filled with accidents, injuries, and medical procedures guaranteed to make you simultaneously wince and laugh to the point of tears.

Andrew Butters (Author), Andrew Butters (Narrator)

Audiobook

Essays & Memoirs Audiobooks in Comedy