Essays & Memoirs Audiobooks | Comedy

Riding the Elephant: A Memoir of Altercations, Humiliations, Hallucinations, and Observations

From the comedian, actor, and former host of The Late Late Show comes an irreverent, lyrical memoir in essays featuring his signature wit. Craig Ferguson has defied the odds his entire life. He has failed when he should have succeeded and succeeded when he should have failed. The fact that he is neither dead nor in a locked facility (at the time of printing) is something of a miracle in itself. In Craig's candid and revealing memoir, listeners will get a look into the mind and recollections of the unique and twisted Scottish American who became a national hero for pioneering the world's first TV robot skeleton sidekick and reviving two dudes in a horse suit dancing as a form of entertainment. In Riding the Elephant, there are some stories that are too graphic for television, too politically incorrect for social media, or too meditative for a stand-up comedy performance. Craig discusses his deep love for his native Scotland, examines his profound psychic change brought on by fatherhood, and looks at aging and mortality with a perspective that he was incapable of as a younger man. Each story is strung together in a colorful tapestry that ultimately reveals a complicated man who has learned to process-and even enjoy-the unusual trajectory of his life. Katie Falkenberg/Los Angeles Times/Contour by Getty Images

Craig Ferguson (Author), Craig Ferguson (Narrator)

Audiobook

Happy Fat: Taking Up Space in a World That Wants to Shrink You

'Perfect, kind, hilarious and persuasive' Lena Dunham 'I am a fat person and I love my body. I feel lucky to be able to say that - it has taken a lot of work and a lot of time. I want to tell you what I have learned and how I got here.' In Happy Fat, comedian Sofie Hagen shares how she removed fatphobic influences from her daily life and found self-acceptance in a world where judgement and discrimination are rife. From shame and sex to airplane seats, love and getting stuck in public toilets, Sofie provides practical tips for readers - drawing wisdom from other Fat Liberation champions along the way. Part memoir, part social commentary, Happy Fat is a funny, angry and impassioned look at how taking up space in a culture that is desperate to reduce you can be radical, emboldening and life-changing.

Sofie Hagen (Author), Sofie Hagen (Narrator)

Audiobook

Fifty Things That Aren't My Fault: Essays from the Grown-up Years

From the creator of the iconic 'Cathy' comic strip comes her first collection of funny, wise, poignant, and incredibly honest essays about being a woman in what she lovingly calls 'the panini generation.' As the creator of 'Cathy,' Cathy Guisewite found her way into the hearts of readers more than forty years ago, and has been there ever since. Her hilarious and deeply relatable look at the challenges of womanhood in a changing world became a cultural touchstone for women everywhere. Now Guisewite returns with her signature wit and warmth in this debut essay collection about another time of big transition, when everything starts changing and disappearing without permission: aging parents, aging children, aging self stuck in the middle. With her uniquely wry and funny admissions and insights, Guisewite unearths the humor and horror of everything from the mundane (trying to introduce her parents to TiVo and facing four decades' worth of unorganized photos) to the profound (finding a purpose post-retirement, helping parents downsize their lives, and declaring freedrom from all those things that hold us back). No longer confined to the limits of four comic panels, Guisewite holds out her hand in prose form and becomes a reassuring companion for those on the threshold of 'what happens next.' Heartfelt and humane and always cathartic, Fifty Things That Aren't My Fault is ideal reading for mothers, daughters, and anyone who is caught somewhere in between.

Cathy Guisewite (Author), Anna Guisewite, Cathy Guisewite (Narrator)

Audiobook

Go See the Principal: True Tales from the School Trenches

From an elementary school principal and popular YouTube personality, inspiration and humor for educators to tackle the challenges they face day-in and day-out Gerry Brooks is an elementary school principal turned YouTube celebrity who entertains K-12 teachers, administrators, and parents across the country. He tells jokes with the kind of mocking humor that gets a laugh, yet can be safely shared in school. After all, even great schools have bad days -- when lesson plans fall through, disgruntled parents complain, kids throw temper tantrums because they have to use the same spoon for their applesauce and mashed potatoes, and of course, dealing with...The Horror! The Horror!...dreaded assessments. Ranging from practical topics like social media use in the classroom and parent-teacher conferences to more lighthearted sections such as 'Pickup and Dropoff: An Exercise in Humanity' and 'School Supplies: Yes, We Really Need All That Stuff,' Go See the Principal offers comic relief, inspiration, and advice to those who need it the most.

Gerry Brooks (Author), Andrea Gonzales, Angela Gonzales, Gerry Brooks (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Wrong End of the Table: A Mostly Comic Memoir of a Muslim Arab American Woman Just Trying to Fit

An Immigrant Love-Hate Story of What it Means to Be American You know that feeling of being at the wrong end of the table? Like you’re at a party but all the good stuff is happening out of earshot (#FOMO)? That’s life—especially for an immigrant. What happens when a shy, awkward Arab girl with a weird name and an unfortunate propensity toward facial hair is uprooted from her comfortable (albeit fascist-regimed) homeland of Iraq and thrust into the cold, alien town of Columbus, Ohio—with its Egg McMuffins, Barbie dolls, and kids playing doctor everywhere you turned? This is Ayser Salman’s story. First comes Emigration, then Naturalization, and finally Assimilation—trying to fit in among her blonde-haired, blue-eyed counterparts, and always feeling left out. On her journey to Americanhood, Ayser witnesses a blowjob at pre-kindergarten daycare, breaks one of her parents’ rules (“Thou shalt not participate as an actor in the school musical where a male cast member rests his head in thy lap”), and other things good Muslim Arab girls are not supposed to do. And, after the 9/11 attacks, she experiences the isolation of being a Muslim in her own country. It takes hours of therapy, fifty-five rounds of electrolysis, and some ill-advised romantic dalliances for Ayser to grow into a modern Arab American woman who embraces her cultural differences. Part memoir and part how-not-to guide, The Wrong End of the Table is everything you wanted to know about Arabs but were afraid to ask, with chapters such as “Tattoos and Other National Security Risks,” “You Can’t Blame Everything on Your Period; Sometimes You’re Going to Be a Crazy Bitch: and Other Advice from Mom,” and even an open letter to Trump. This is the story of every American outsider on a path to find themselves in a country of beautiful diversity.

Ayser Salman (Author), Ayser Salman (Narrator)

Audiobook

Humble Pi: A Comedy of Maths Errors

Penguin presents the audiobook edition of Humble Pi written and read by Matt Parker. What makes a bridge wobble when it's not meant to? Billions of dollars mysteriously vanish into thin air? A building rock when its resonant frequency matches a gym class leaping to Snap's 1990 hit I've Got The Power? The answer is maths. Or, to be precise, what happens when maths goes wrong in the real world. As Matt Parker shows us, our modern lives are built on maths: computer programmes, finance, engineering. And most of the time this maths works quietly behind the scenes, until ... it doesn't. Exploring and explaining a litany of glitches, near-misses and mishaps involving the internet, big data, elections, street signs, lotteries, the Roman empire and a hapless Olympic shooting team, Matt Parker shows us the bizarre ways maths trips us up, and what this reveals about its essential place in our world. Mathematics doesn't have good 'people skills', but we would all be better off, he argues, if we saw it as a practical ally. This book shows how, by making maths our friend, we can learn from its pitfalls. It also contains puzzles, challenges, geometric socks, jokes about binary code and three deliberate mistakes. Getting it wrong has never been more fun.

Matt Parker (Author), Matt Parker (Narrator)

Audiobook

Surprisingly Down to Earth, and Very Funny: My Autobiography

The hysterical, shocking and incredibly intimate memoir from one of the most original and unique comedians alive today. Hello! I'm Brian Limond, aka Limmy. You might know me from Limmy's Show. Or you might not know me at all. Don't worry if you don't. They asked me to write a book about mental health, because I sometimes talk about my mental health in tweets and interviews, like suicidal thoughts and anxiety, and what I've done to try and deal with it. I said to them, oh, I don't know if I could fill a whole book with just that. But how's about I write a general autobiography type of thing, and all the mental health stuff will naturally appear along the way? I could talk about growing up and slashing my wrist and taking acid all the time and getting done for car theft and feeling like a mad freak that would never amount to anything. And then how I made my own sketch show. I directed it and everything. Plus I'm a dad. I'm an adult. But I still feel like that mad freak from years ago. I still feel like chucking it all away, for a laugh. I asked them if they wanted me to write about all that, plus some other stuff. Like being an alky. And my sexual problems. Stuff like that. They said aye. So here it is.

Limmy (Author), Limmy (Narrator)

Audiobook

From the Top: Brief Transmissions from Tent Show Radio

“I’m happy to go to the opera, but I should like to be allowed to wear steel-toed boots with my evening suit. I like to read Harper’s with a chaser of Varmint HunterMagazine. Maybe that’s why I enjoy a good show under canvas. Here we sit, brain-deep in arts and culture, but we’re also just people hanging out in a tent, some of us wearing logging boots, a few of us wearing Birkenstocks, but best of all we’re breathing free fresh air filled with music.” From Scandihoovian Spanglish to snickering chickens, New York Times best-selling author and humorist Michael Perry navigates a wide range of topics in this collection of brief essays drawn from his weekly appearances on the nationally syndicated Tent Show Radio program. Fatherhood, dumpster therapy, dangerous wedding rings, Christmas trees, used cars, why you should have bacon in your stock portfolio, loggers in clogs - whatever the subject, Perry has a rare ability to touch both the funny bone and the heart. ©2013 Michael Perry (P) 2019 Michael Perry

Michael Perry (Author), Michael Perry (Narrator)

Audiobook

How to be Alone: If You Want to, and Even If You Don't

The former Sex & Relationships Editor for Cosmopolitan and host of the wildly popular comedy show Tinder Live with Lane Moore presents her poignant, funny, and deeply moving first book. Lane Moore is a rare performer who is as impressive onstage—whether hosting her iconic show Tinder Live or being the enigmatic front woman of It Was Romance—as she is on the page, as both a former writer for The Onion and an award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had. From spending the holidays alone to having better "stranger luck" than with those closest to her to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance—with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift. How to Be Alone is a must-read for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it's a book for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone and a little more connected through reading her words.

Lane Moore (Author), Lane Moore (Narrator)

Audiobook

[French] - La fois où j'ai écrit un livre

D’abord présentées sur les ondes d’Énergie puis de Rouge FM, les chroniques de Rosalie Bonenfant ont conquis des dizaines de milliers d’auditeurs. Tantôt mordantes et cyniques, tantôt intimistes et sensibles, les « humeurs » de Rosalie ne rejoignent pas que les gens de sa génération mais tous les Québécois, de l’adolescent au boomer… à l’exception de quelques « matantes » indignées par son ton direct ou la crudité d’un thème ou d’un mot. Qu’elle parle d’enjeux sociaux importants (le couple, le consentement, la famille, le féminisme, les préjugés, l’image de soi, le suicide) ou plus légers (le pot, la relâche, les potins, les galas, le temps des fêtes), Rosalie sait extraire de chaque sujet le zeste qui pique et qui fait mouche, que ce soit avec l’insolence d’une ado ou la sagesse d’une vieille âme. Ceux et celles qui l’ont appréciée et adoptée à la radio auront plaisir à relire ses envolées et ses confidences, tandis que d’autres la découvriront en toutes lettres, dans cette anthologie de 67 chroniques qui leur en feront voir de toutes les couleurs. Les débuts littéraires d’une enfant terrible dont on n’a pas fini d’entendre parler !

Rosalie Bonenfant (Author), Rosalie Bonenfant (Narrator)

Audiobook

My Squirrel Days

Comedian and star of The Office and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Ellie Kemper delivers a hilarious and uplifting collection of essays about one pale woman's journey from Midwestern naïf to Hollywood semi-celebrity to outrageously reasonable New Yorker. There comes a time in every sitcom actress's life when she is faced with the prospect of writing a book. When Ellie Kemper's number was up, she was ready. Contagiously cheerful, predictably wholesome, and mostly inspiring except for one essay about her husband's feet, My Squirrel Days is a funny, free-wheeling tour of Ellie's life—from growing up in suburban St. Louis with a vivid imagination and a crush on David Letterman to moving to Los Angeles and accidentally falling on Doris Kearns Goodwin. But those are not the only famous names dropped in this synopsis. Ellie will also share stories of inadvertently insulting Ricky Gervais at the Emmy Awards, telling Tina Fey that she has "great hair—really strong and thick," and offering a maxi pad to Steve Carell. She will take you back to her childhood as a nature lover determined to commune with squirrels, to her college career as a benchwarming field hockey player with no assigned position, and to her young professional days writing radio commercials for McDonald's but never getting paid. Ellie will guide you along her journey through adulthood, from unorganized bride to impatient wife to anxious mother who—as recently observed by a sassy hairstylist—"dresses like a mom." Well, sassy hairstylist, Ellie Kemper is a mom. And she has been dressing like it since she was four. Ellie has written for GQ, Esquire, The New York Times, McSweeney's, and The Onion. Her voice is the perfect antidote to the chaos of modern life. In short, she will tell you nothing you need to know about making it in show business, and everything you need to know about discreetly changing a diaper at a Cibo Express.

Ellie Kemper (Author), Ellie Kemper (Narrator)

Audiobook

Everything's Trash, But It's Okay

Entertainment Weekly's Fall 2018's 25 Must-Reads Essence's Fall 2018 Guide to All Things Funny Bustle's 18 New Nonfiction Books to Know in October 'Robinson offers deft cultural criticism and hilarious personal anecdotes that will make readers laugh, cringe, and cry. Everything may indeed be trash but writing like this reminds us that we're gonna make it through all the terrible things with honesty, laughter, and faith.' --Roxane Gay, New York Times bestselling author New York Times bestselling author and star of 2 Dope Queens Phoebe Robinson is back with a new, hilarious, and timely essay collection on gender, race, dating, and the dumpster fire that is our world. Written in her trademark unfiltered and witty style, Robinson's latest collection is a call to arms. Outfitted with on-point pop culture references, these essays tackle a wide range of topics: giving feminism a tough-love talk on intersectionality, telling society's beauty standards to kick rocks, and calling foul on our culture's obsession with work. Robinson also gets personal, exploring money problems she's hidden from her parents, how dating is mainly a warmed-over bowl of hot mess, and definitely most important, meeting Bono not once, but twice. She's struggled with being a woman with a political mind and a woman with an ever-changing jeans size. She knows about trash because she sees it every day--and because she's seen roughly one hundred thousand hours of reality TV and zero hours of Schindler's List. With the intimate voice of a new best friend, Everything's Trash, But It's Okay is a candid perspective for a generation that has had the rug pulled out from under it too many times to count.

Phoebe Robinson (Author), Phoebe Robinson (Narrator)

Audiobook

Essays & Memoirs Audiobooks in Comedy