Audiobooks by M T Mcguire

When trouble comes knocking, meet the one man dumb enough to answer the door. When The Pan of Hamgee encounters some mudlarkers trying to land a box on the banks of the River Dang he is happy to help. Having accepted a share of the contents as a reward he cannot believe his luck. It contains one of the most expensive delicacies available in K’Barth, Goojan spiced sausage. If he can sell it, the sausage might spell the end of his troubles. On the other hand, knowing his luck, it could bring a whole load more. Probably the only book you'll hear with a gripping 11 mph barge chase. Suggested UK cinema rating for this one PG (parental guidance). Humorous science fiction fantasy set in a parallel reality. ASK THE AUTHOR Q – What made you write this series? A – If you want the honest answer I wrote it for me. I love British satire and humor (or humour). I love wit; funny epic fantasy series like the Discworld novels and comedic sci fi like Douglas Adams. I like a gripping tale that zips along quickly. And of course, I like genre fiction mashups; Douglas Adams meets StarTrek and James Bond - with a smidge of Dr Who and a dash of romance (but no squelchy bits). I wanted a fast paced story, a gripping tale but at the same time a funny one. Comedy in the tradition of all the great humorous British authors. I wanted protagonists people could love and empathise with, mavericks, misfit characters, real people ... except they're not all people obviously, some of them are other alien (ish) species. The Hamgeean Misfit series is science fiction fantasy action - it's planet based, so it's a bit of a blend. You'll find all sorts of quirky characters and interesting alien species: from 6ft Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry creatures like the Blurpons with their fluffy ears, big button eyes and penchant for extreme violence. Oh ... and did I mention the flying car chases?

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Close Enough

The world is crying out for a hero ... pity they're all busy. As recently appointed delivery man for Big Merv, one of Ning Dang Po's most powerful crime bosses, The Pan of Hamgee is ordered to deliver a gift to Big Merv's current girlfriend. With a pair of bespoke-made, sapphire and diamond earrings on board, and a trip across the city in the offing, what could possibly go wrong? Everything. Suggested UK cinema rating for this one PG (parental guidance) This is a humorous science fiction fantasy story set in a parallel reality. INTERVIEW WITH THE AUTHOR Q – So, tell us about this series. Why did you write it? Why is it special? A – There's a saying, somewhere, that if the book you want to read hasn't been written, you must write it. So I wrote it for me. A lot of it is a homage to the things I love: StarWars, Adams, Pratchett, Dr Who, StarTrek. Hopefully, anyone reading will like the same things as I do: the world building, the characterisation, what, I hope, is pithy, witty dialogue (or dialog) and of course, characters who are flawed and stuff up, and are not beautiful, misfits, ne’r do wells etc. There's not one skinny woman in a leather jumpsuit anywhere in this series. I like writing characters who have zero combat skills, putting them in a situation where they could really do with knowing how to fight and seeing how they cope with nothing but their wits - I'm mean like that. ... Oh and of course the snurds. You've gotta love a flying car, right? Grab a free 90 minute short story when you join M T McGuire's Jolly Japes Group: Discover more here: https://www.hamgee.co.uk/audio_ns1.html

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Nothing To See Here

The world is crying out for a hero ... pity they're all busy. It’s midwinter and preparations for the biggest religious festival in the K’Barthan year are in full swing. Yes, even though, officially, religious activity has been banned, no-one’s going to ignore Arnold, The Prophet’s Birthday, especially not Big Merv. He orders The Pan of Hamgee to deliver the traditional Prophet’s Birthday gift to his accountants and lawyers. As usual, The Pan has managed to elicit the unwanted attention of the security forces. Can he make the delivery and get back to the Parrot and Screwdriver pub in time for an unofficial Prophet’s Birthday celebration with his friends? Nothing to See Here is written in British English and is the second in a series, although it can be read as a stand alone story. Estimated UK film rating of this book is: U (universal) or G (general) This is a humorous science fiction fantasy story set in a parallel reality. INTERVIEW WITH THE AUTHOR Q – So, tell us about this series. Why did you write it? Why is it special? A – There's a saying, somewhere, that if the book you want to read hasn't been written, you must write it. So I wrote it for me. A lot of it is a homage to the things I love: StarWars, Adams, Pratchett, Dr Who, StarTrek. Hopefully, anyone reading will like the same things as I do: the world building, the characterisation, what, I hope, is pithy, witty dialogue (or dialog) and of course, characters who are flawed and stuff up, and are not beautiful, misfits, ne’r do wells etc. There's not one skinny woman in a leather jumpsuit anywhere in this series. I like writing characters who have zero combat skills, putting them in a situation where they could really do with knowing how to fight and seeing how they cope with nothing but their wits - I'm mean like that. ... Oh and of course the snurds. You've gotta love a flying car, right?

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Small Beginnings

If trouble comes knocking, be out. When your very existence is treason, employment opportunities are thin on the ground. But when one of the biggest crime lords in the city makes The Pan of Hamgee a job offer he can’t refuse, it’s hard to tell what the dumbest move is: accepting the offer or saying no to Big Merv. Neither will do much for The Pan’s life expectancy. Short(ish) listen at 2hrs 20mins. Approximate film rating, PG. ASK THE AUTHOR Q – More K'Barthan stuff. Is there a reason for that? A – Yeh, there is logic in my madness. I get a lot of requests for it and at the time I started this series, doing some shorter, simpler books about characters I already know fitted neatly into my lifestyle. In Unlucky Dip, our hero meets Big Merv for the first time and manages to avoid being concreted into a motorway support: but only in return for working for him as a gofer. The main series of novels starts a year or so after that. People wrote to me asking me what The Pan got up to in that year as a gofer. So ... I thought I'd tell them! Q – What influenced you? A – Blimey! Where do I start? I love British satire and humor (or humour). I love wit; funny epic series like the Discworld novels and comedic sci fi like Douglas Adams but I also love Monty Python, Little Britain, the Fast Show, Fr Ted, Not the Nine O'Clock News ... Porridge, The Two Ronnies ... and it's all in there. I love Red Dwarf, StarTrek - especially the really cheesy original series - and Dr Who. I LOVE Dr Who. But I also love Spaghetti Westerns, Historical Novels and James Bond. It's not just that it has to be a gripping tale that zips along quickly. It has to do some serious genre mashing. It has to be difficult to categorise because otherwise, for me it's boring, because life is about more than one thing. So it's Douglas Adams meets StarTrek and James Bond - with a smidgeon of Dr Who.

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

K'Barthan Box Set: All four K'Barthan Series volumes in one huge 63 hour audiobook

A man called by fate. The wrong man. All The Pan of Hamgee wants is a quiet life. So why did he have to fall in love with a woman living a different version of reality, upset a murderous tyrant and then run out of places to hide? Now all he has to do is face his inner demons, rescue everything he holds dear and save the world, or die trying. Oh yes, and he's an abject coward. Great. No pressure then. Approximate cinema rating: PG/12. Includes some light swearing of the kind that would be acceptable in the UK. ASK THE AUTHOR Q – So, what made you write this series? A – If you want the honest answer I wrote it for me. As a reader, I love British satire and humor (or humour). I love wit; funny epic fantasy series like the Discworld novels and comedic sci fi like Douglas Adams. I like a gripping tale that zips along quickly. And of course, I like genre fiction mashups; Douglas Adams meets StarTrek and James Bond - with a smidgeon of Dr Who and a dash of romance (but no squelchy bits). I wanted a fast paced story, a gripping tale but at the same time a funny one. Comedy in the tradition of all the great humorous British authors. I wanted protagonists people could love and empathise with, mavericks, misfit characters, real people ... except they're not all people obviously, some of them are other alien (ish) species. The K'Barthan series about misfit heroes and heroines winning the day, it’s about good versus evil even when the good guys are on different sides. It's science fiction fantasy action - it's planet based, so it's a bit of a blend. You'll find all sorts of quirky characters and interesting alien species: from 6ft Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry creatures like the Blurpons, with their fluffy ears, big button eyes and penchant for extreme violence. Oh ... and did I mention the flying car chases?

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

One Man: No Plan

The Pan of Hamgee needs answers, although he’s not even sure he knows the questions. He has a chance to go straight but it’s been so long that he’s almost forgotten how. Despite a death warrant over his head he is released, given a state-sponsored business, and a year’s amnesty for all misdemeanours while he adjusts. On the down side, Ruth has left him for his nemesis, Lord Vernon. The Pan doesn’t have a year, either. In only five days Lord Vernon will gain total power and destroy K'Barth. Unless The Pan can stop him. Because even though the Candidate, the person prophesied to save K'Barth, has finally appeared it's still going to be down to The Pan to make things right. But he has no clue where to start or whether he even can. The future hangs by a thread and the only person who can fix it is The Pan: a man without a plan. A WORD WITH THE AUTHOR What made you write the K'Barthan Series? Why is it special? You know the saying: that if the book you want doesn't exist you must write it? That. I love funny British authors, comedic sci fi, epic fantasy, adventure, action, humour - or humor. Misfit characters are great, the weirder the better and an evil baddie. I like genre fiction mashups: alien races, flying cars, car chases, static powered laser guns. Dr Who meets Terry Pratchett. K'Barth is kind of first contact, only not. There are quirky characters, from 6ft Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry Blurpons with fluffy ears, button eyes and love of extreme violence. But the eternal questions they face mirror ours. This series should be read in order: This is book 3, to make sense of it, listen to Few Are Chosen, K'Barthan Series: Part 1 and The Wrong Stuff, K'Barthan Series: Part 2, first. The last book is Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Series: Part 4 There's also a 30min prequel, Unlucky Dip, which is free if you join my mailing list: https://www.hamgee.co.uk/audioud.html

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Looking For Trouble

The Pan of Hamgee doesn’t believe in miracles but if he’s going to save K’Barth it looks as if he might need one. He's not quite as alone as he thought. The punters from The Parrot and Screwdriver are right behind him and he has rescued three of his friends from the Grongolian Security Forces, who are now of course, three of the nation's most wanted, which doesn't make life easy. He even has something of a plan for once. It involves making peace with the Resistance, trying to resurrect the Underground movement, and toppling Lord Vernon. Now, The Pan just needs to keep his head down and maintain a low profile. He must be brave and clever and stay in control. That's going to be a first. But the hardest part will be staying alive long enough to put his plan into action. Q - So, tell us about the K’Barthan Series. What made you write it? What makes it special? A - You know that saying, that if the book you want doesn't exist you have to write it? That. I love funny British authors, comedic, epic, fantasy, sci-fi, adventure, action, British humour - or humor. Misfit characters, the weirder the better, a love-to-hate baddie, a genre mash up like StarWars. I like weird alien races, flying cars, car chases, static powered lasers. Dr Who meets Terry Pratchet. K'Barth is kind of first contact, only not. You'll find all sorts of quirky characters, from six feet Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry Blurpons, with fluffy ears, big button eyes and a penchant for extreme violence. But for all that, the eternal questions they face are the same as ours. This series is best read in order: Few Are Chosen, K'Barthan Series: Part 1, 2. The Wrong Stuff, K'Barthan Series: Part 2, 3.One Man: No Plan, K'Barthan Series: Part 3 and 4. Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Series: Part 4 There's also a 30min prequel, Unlucky Dip, which is free, for details go to: https://www.hamgee.co.uk/audioud.html

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Wrong Stuff

The Pan of Hamgee is not a natural knight in shining armour. Yet he has escaped from police custody in K’Barth, switched realities and foiled Lord Vernon’s attempt to kidnap Ruth, the Chosen One, from the Festival Hall. Pretty good, he thinks. However, Ruth thinks otherwise. Being pursued by Lord Vernon is bad enough. Now, thanks to The Pan, she’s on the run. They are both alive, of course, but with Lord Vernon on their tail neither of them can be sure how long for. To save K'Barth and Ruth, the woman of his dreams, The Pan must introduce her to the Candidate, who is prophesied to be the man of her dreams. And he must do it fast – before Lord Vernon finds her. But the gentleman in question is in hiding and no-one knows where. Only The Pan can find him, if he can bring himself to unite them. A WORD WITH THE AUTHOR Q - What made you write the K'Barthan Series? Why is it special? A - You know the saying: that if the book you want doesn't exist you have to write it? That. I love funny British authors, comedic sci fi, epic fantasy, adventure, action, humour - or humor. Misfit characters are great, the weirder the better and an evil baddie. I like genre fiction mashups: StarWars with alien races, flying cars, car chases, static powered laser guns. Dr Who meets Terry Pratchett and James Bond. K'Barth is kind of first contact, only not. There are many quirky characters, from 6ft Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry Blurpons with fluffy ears, big button eyes and penchant for extreme violence. But the eternal questions they face mirror ours. This is the 2nd book in a series of 4. If you haven't listened Few Are Chosen, it's best to start there. The others are: - One Man: No Plan, K'Barthan Series: Part 3, - Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Series: Part 4 - Unlucky Dip free 30min prequel more info here: https://www.hamgee.co.uk/audioud.html

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Few Are Chosen

When the finger of fate points ... duck! Meet The Pan of Hamgee: coward, unwilling adventurer and, by some miracle, K’Barth’s longest surviving outlaw. He just wants a quiet life so working as getaway driver is probably a bad career move. Then he falls in love at first sight with a woman he hasn't even met who comes from an alternative reality. That’s when things really begin to get complicated. Meet Ruth Cochrane: she’s the Chosen One, destined to play a pivotal role in saving K’Barth from a cruel dictator. She’s never heard of K’Barth, though. She’s a public relations executive from London and she’s totally unaware of the chaos about to hit her life. Meet Lord Vernon: power hungry psychopath on the brink of world domination. He wants to cement his hold on K'Barth by kidnapping the Chosen One and forcing her to marry him. Only one person is standing in his way: someone who doesn’t even realise it, The Pan of Hamgee. For The Pan, and Ruth, that’s a deadly problem. A word with the authorQ - Why did you write the K'Barthan Series? Why is it special? A - There's a saying: if the book you want doesn't exist you have to write it.I love funny British authors, comedic sci fi, epic fantasy, adventure, action, humour - or humor. Misfit characters are great, the weirder the better. I like genre mashups: StarWars, alien races, flying cars, car chases, static powered laser guns. Dr Who meets James Bond ... sort of. K'Barth is kind of first contact, only not. There are many quirky characters from 6ft Swamp Things with antennae, to cute furry Blurpons with fluffy ears, big button eyes and a penchant for extreme violence. But the eternal questions they face mirror ours. Other books in this series: The Wrong Stuff, K'Barthan Series: Part 2, One Man: No Plan, K'Barthan Series: Part 3, Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Series: Part 4 For a free 90min series prequel go here: https://www.hamgee.co.uk/audio_ns1.html

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Unlucky Dip: Short story prequel

The Pan of Hamgee, starving outlaw, bumps into Big Merv; the meanest, scariest gangster in the City and without thinking what he is doing, steals his wallet. When Big Merv realises what has happened our hero's future looks short. Will he talk his way out of it or will he be 'recycled' into a stanchion of the Outer Ring Road extension. U certificate. British comedy, British English. This comedic sci fi quick read is a short story prequel to the K'Barthan Series. AUTHOR INTERVIEW Q – What maks the K'Barthan Series special? A – There's a saying, somewhere, that if the book you want to read hasn't been written, you must write it. So, I wrote it for me. I have always loved British satire and humor or humour. I love funny epic fantasy series like the Discworld novels and comedic sci fi like Douglas Adams. I like a gripping tale that zips along quickly in the time honoured tradition of adventure and action fiction I like misfit characters, the weirder and more colourful the better. I like genre mashups; Douglas Adams meets StarTrek, Doctor Who, Terry Pratchett and James Bond. My cunning gambit was science fantasy which would surprise me. Stuff with weird alien races, flying car chases, static powered laser guns ... I wanted a fast paced story, a gripping tale but with comedy, too, in the tradition of the great funny British authors. K'Barth is about aliens; kind of first contact, only not. You will find all sorts of quirky characters, from six feet Swamp Things with antennae to cute furry Blurpons, with their fluffy ears, big button eyes and penchant for extreme violence. But for all that, the eternal questions they face are the same as ours. Q – What are the other books in series? A – After Unlucky Dip, there are: Few Are Chosen, K'Barthan Series: Part 1, The Wrong Stuff, K'Barthan Series: Part 2, One Man: No Plan, K'Barthan Series: Part 3, Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Series: Part 4

M T Mcguire (Author), Gareth Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook