As the year 2000 bears down, the best-selling author of Politically Correct Bedtime Stories, James Finn Garner, confronts a series of monumental questions: Will we remember to order new checks from the bank? Did our invitation to the Kennedy New Year's party get lost in the mail again? Are we all poised on the brink of worldwide enlightenment or complete planetary destruction? Should you really bother investing in that Five-Year CD?
"Tonight," in the unforgettable words of The Artist Formerly Known as Prince, "We're gonna party like it's 1999." The end is near...or at least nearer than it used to be, says Garner. Humanity is wracked by millennial panic and apocalyptic anticipation -- or if it isn't already, just wait until it reads Garner's latest (and last?). In it, he sets off on a slightly-to-the-South-of-skeptical pilgrimage in search of the truth behind the end times predictions.
The #1 bestselling author of Once Upon a More Enlightened Time reads his Politically Correct holiday gift.
Holiday tales have long delighted and entertained us, but until now they've always been burdened with society's skewed values and mores. Stories that reinforce the stifling class system (Dickens' A Christmas Carol), legitimize the stereotype of a merry, overweight patriarchal oppressor (Santa Claus in The Night Before Christmas) and justify the domestication and subjugation of wild animals (Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer) abound in the literature and lore of this season.
Now James Finn Garner has stepped in to revise and improve these familiar tales to free our social consciousness from the ghost of prejudice past. From the newly revised "Twas the Night Before Solstice" to "Rudolph the Nasally Empowered Reindeer," these stories rekindle the true holiday spirit and redefine the idea of "good will to all men" to include womyn, pre-adults and companion animals as well.
Yes, the international bestselling author of Politically Correct Bedtime Stories and Once Upon a More Enlightened Time is back again, to offer a holiday gift that will fit all sizes, welcome all persuasions and nonpersuasions, and be treasured for politically correct generations to come.
"The hilarious sequel to the #1 phenomenon Politically Correct Bedtime Stories.
"If we can cleanse these stories and put an end to the lies our children are spoon-fed while being spoon-fed...the world may finally become a decent place for persunkind and other, equally important species." -- James Finn Garner
Spurred by the overwhelming success of the million-copy bestseller, Politically Correct Bedtime Stories, James Finn Garner continues his quest to liberate "classic" fairy tales from their archaic, sexist, ageist, classist, lookist and environmentally unsound prejudices.
In Once Upon A More Enlightened Time, Garner tackles many demeaning, culturally biased viewpoints through his retelling of such well-known tales as "The Princess and the Pea" and "The Tortoise and the Hare." He has striven to fashion these bedtime stories into literature that is totally free from bias and purged from the influences of a flawed cultural past in hopes of freeing our social consciousness from these blights.
If he succeeds, no longer will tortoises, hares, talking frogs and other citizens of nature bear the burden of our insecurities. No longer will mer-people suffer because of their unique evolutionary niche. And no longer will capable young womyn sleep their lives away waiting for princes to come rescue them.
