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Audiobooks by Christopher D. Schmitz
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A contract killer. A gorgeous victim. And a mystic garden hidden beyond the Winter Court.
Remy Keaton is Aderyn Corff—the Death Bird—and a notorious assassin of the unseelie court. But what the fey don’t know is that Remy is a human… and that Remy hates killing. Too bad he’s so good at it.
When Remy is forced to track down and murder a beautiful sidhe Lady of the Court whose only crime is being more attractive than Queen Rhagathena, he must ask himself difficult questions. The orc warlord who pulls Aderyn Corff’s strings demands blood, but perhaps there is some wiggle room in the spider queen’s hit-list… and perhaps ascertaining that is the key to breaking free of the arcane vow that binds the human to the fey’s service.
Can Remy defeat the oath that has bound him to the spider queen’s service, or must he kill Lady Fenelope to satisfy the laws of his oath?
This short story is a prequel in the Curse of the Fey Duelist series, beginning in book 1: A Kiss of Daggers. If you like dark fantasy, paranormal, and urban fantasy with elves, magic, and mystery, then you need this book. For fans of Sarah J. Maas, Holly Black, or Cassandra Clare.
Betrayed. Erased. And made an orcish slave.
A human child falls into the hands of a fey warlord with aspirations to the unseelie throne. But when that child learns to fight and grows into a shadow-killer of the faewylds, old grudges flock home to roost.
Remy Keaton’s memories of his prior humanity may have been snuffed out, but when the brutal warlord Rhylfelour takes things too far, Remy makes a strange alliance with the Spider Lady, Rhagathena—illegitimate queen of the Rime Throne. But with hers and the warlord’s eyes both set upon rule of the unseelie court, will Remy’s revenge trade one monster for an even worse one—one set up to strangle the Winter Court in webs of deceit and skullduggery?
All vengeance comes exacts a toll… can Remy Keaton afford to pay its steep price? With Rhylfelour’s murderous fits of rage, can Remy afford not to pay it?
If you like dark fantasy, paranormal, and urban fantasy with elves, magic, and mystery, then you need this book. For fans of Sarah J. Maas, Rae Carson, Holly Black, and Cassandra Clare.
Click buy it now and explore the unseelie realms today!
Dragons & Fire. Dwarves and Magic Axes... and a whole lot of goblins!
Hy’Targ the dwarf and his crew take up the mantle of the Gods’own: the chosen champions of the gods. When Hy’Targ, Varanthl, Mantieth, and Elorall set out to quest after a mysterious relic so that crazed Death cultists cannot retrieve it, the Gods’own finds themselves flung into a much larger adventure than they could have ever foreseen!
Hoping to find the stolen dragonkin belonging to the Adventurer King, Hy’Targ and the Gods’own split their attention and head through trog-infested lands en route to a human city where the dwarf prince’s adversarial uncle has traveled. There, they discover an ancient symbol leading to the gremmlobahnd: the mysterious gnomes who seemingly disappeared from Esfah long ago. And what the party discovers has everyone pursuing them.
More questions are asked than the Gods’own can seemingly answer. What is the Kreethaln's real purpose? Who is the Gray Wanderer? Where did Taryl’s nephew disappear to, and who is that red elf on the horizon?
But for Hy’Targ, something bothers him more than the wars erupting around his continent. More disturbing than the black dragon riders, crazed cultists, the new rising army of goblins, or even the evidence that Melkior is defeated but not permanently, is the revelation of his mother’s fate. Queen Sh’Ttil may be gone forever—but a member of his own party may have had something to do with it.
Blood. Elves. And Duels. This is Arcadeax: a mystic land of honor, intrigue, and spellpunk arcana.
A childhood tragedy trapped Remy Keaton in the faewylds with nothing but a blade forged by his need for vengeance. He doesn't remember his human life before that day but long ago learned the harsh ways of the seelie courts.
When Remy rescues the daughter of a wealthy elven merchant from bandits he falls madly in love with her. But a kiss from the elf girl would bring him a curse. Not only is love between the fey and the sons of Adam forbidden, but Jaira was promised to another: a capricious elf noble with a murderous reputation.
The only option for Remy is to win a dueling contest that will earn him the kiss he desires and quite possibly purchase the respect of the fey kingdom. But when an enemy offers to restore Remy's lost life, he learns the high cost of either option: abandon the woman he loves to the wickedness of her betrothed, or enter the fight of his life and lose his past for ever. Regardless of his decision, Remy must still face the horrors of Cathair Dé's arena.
Can Remy and his friends escape Cathair Dé alive?
If you like dark fantasy, paranormal, and urban fantasy with elves, magic, and mystery, then you need this book. For fans of Sarah J. Maas, Rae Carson, Holly Black, and Cassandra Clare
When a reluctant Dwarven adventurer undertakes a quest on behalf of his blind father, he accidentally awakens an ancient evil banished ages ago. Now, with dark elves and goblinoid trogs snapping at his heels, Hy’Targ must prevent a powerful lich from reuniting with the ancient bones of his lover. Failure means a new age of darkness will spread across the land.
Prince Hy’Targ of the Irontooth vagha would much rather stay in the library and read about the exploits of others. In his studies, however, he uncovers the tale of a powerful artifact he believes could restore his father’s sight. On his quest, he accidentally triggers a trap that releases an ancient undead general that was long ago sealed away to prevent him from beginning a planet-wide uprising of the dead. Hy’Targ knows that this fiend must be destroyed before he can regain his full strength, and he knows where the lich has escaped to.
Journeying towards the creature’s dark tower, he enlists the help of the few souls who believe him, one of whom is an imprisoned thief that must first be freed… a thief who is linked to their problems more closely than they realize. He stole the sacred bones the lich is after and undead scouts pursue his every move. Can this band of unlikely heroes prevent a second rise of the Black Tower?
A devious elder monster allies with the lava elves of the Obsidian Grotto. She promises to provide an elven general with arcane weapons to throw down their dwarven enemies, and also the support of a black magic wielding cult hidden within the Nhur-Gale Forest. General Shedakor assumes that any bargain with such a dark creature would extract a high cost... but can he afford to pay it?
Meanwhile, on the far side of Esfah. An elven hero from the northern coasts embarks on a mission to protect his home from the goblins of Brackishomme swamp. But Davian Whisperwynd is prone to rash vows and the gods will not release the adventurer from a promise to lay down his sword: an oath that complicates things when he promises a beautiful enchanter that he will retrieve an item from the lair of the Death god himself.
Neither knows it, but the gods of fate have interlinked their destinies.
Dekker Knight has a secret past.
Vivian “Vesuvius” Briggs has a sword and a chip on her shoulder.
Together they run a crew of sanctioned space mercenaries: the Dozen.
During an operation gone wrong, an alien spy steals a seemingly insignificant item: a benign seed found on Ganymede. A secret cult believes it has immense power, perhaps coming from the Garden of Eden itself. If it falls into enemy hands, it could wreak unspeakable evil across the galaxy.
The Dozen fight to keep their debts settled, fuel in their ship, and some equilibrance to their moral ledger. They are more than mercenaries: they are part of a family they’ve chosen—and this seed threatens to tear it apart.
Between a corrupt government, and forces in league with the notorious villain, Prognon Austicon, threats squeeze them from every side. Dekker and Austicon have a vendetta. Vivian’s family and Austicon have a history. Austicon has powerful friends and a superweapon. With the fate of the universe hanging in the balance, can the Dozen swing the pendulum back?
A back-alley brawl between the furries and the bronies.
Deadpool cosplayer keeps stealing all the erotic pegasus artwork.
Someone's necronomicon opened a tentacle portal in the men’s room.
Two cops go undercover at a comic-book convention to stop Wil Wheaton’s murder.
You’ll love this buddy cop comicomedy, unless you’re my mom. If you are my mom, please bring me a hot-pocket. I’m in the basement.
If you love Discworld, Hitchhikers Guide, or Bimbos From the Death Sun, then this book is for you! Get it now!
(Also, hot-pockets are on sale, Mom.)
