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Make Russia Great Again: A Novel
The award-winning and bestselling author of Thank You for Smoking delivers a hilarious and whipsmart fake memoir by Herb Nutterman—Donald Trump's seventh chief of staff—who has written the ultimate tell-all about Trump and Russia. Herb Nutterman never intended to become Donald Trump's White House chief of staff. Herb served the Trump Organization for twenty-seven years, holding jobs in everything from a food and beverage manager at the Trump Magnifica to being the first general manager of the Trump Bloody Run Golf Course. And when his old boss asks "his favorite Jew" to take on the daunting role of chief of staff, Herb, spurred on by loyalty, agrees. But being the chief of staff is a lot different from being a former hospitality expert. Soon, Herb finds himself deeply involved in Russian intrigue, deflecting rumors about Mike Pence's high school involvement in a Satanic cult, and leading President Trump's reelection campaign. What Nutterman experiences is outrageous, outlandish, and otherwise unbelievable—therefore making it a deadly accurate account of being the chief of staff during the Trump administration. With hilarious jabs at the biggest world leaders and Washington politics overall, Make Russia Great Again is a timely political satire from "one of the funniest writers in the English language" (Tom Wolfe).
Christopher Buckley (Author), Gibson Frazier (Narrator)
Audiobook
Clint Emerson, Navy SEAL and author of the bestselling 100 Deadly Skills presents an explosive, darkly funny, and often twisted account of being part of an elite clandestine team of covert operatives whose mission was to keep America safe by whatever means necessary. Just be happy he's on our side. Retired Navy SEAL Clint Emerson is the only SEAL ever inducted into the International Spy Museum. Operating from the shadows, with an instinct for running towards trouble, his unique skill set made him the perfect hybrid of elite and modern day counterintelligence agent. Emerson spent his career on the bleeding edge of intelligence and operations, often specializing in solo missions that took advantage of subterfuge, improvisation, the best in recon and surveillance tech, and even elements of Hollywood disguise to combat the changing global battlefield. MacGyvering everyday objects into working spyware was routine, and fellow SEALs referred to his top-secret activities simply as "special shit." His parameters were: find, fix, and finish-and of course, leave no trace. While Emerson was a real life Jason Bourne as well as a decorated soldier, he operated by only two codes: "if you aren't cheating, you aren't trying" and "it's only illegal if you get caught." The Right Kind of Crazy is unlike any military memoir you've ever read because Emerson is upfront about the fact that what makes you a great soldier and sometimes hero doesn't always make you the best guy-but it does make for damn good stories.
Christopher Buckley (Author), James Langton (Narrator)
Audiobook
God Is My Broker [Russian Edition]
This is an incredible story. The author, a failed, alcoholic Wall Street trader, had retreated to a monastery. It, too, was failing. Then, one fateful day, Brother Ty decided to let God be his broker--and not only saved the monastery but discovered the 7 1/2 Laws of Spiritual and Financial Growth. Brother Ty's remarkable success has been studied at the nation's leading business schools and scrutinized by Wall Street's greatest minds, but until now the secret to his 7 1/2 Laws of Spiritual and Financial Growth have been available only to a select few: 87 percent of America's billionaires 28 recent Academy Award winners Over half the recipients of the Nobel Peace Prize No members of the U.S. Congress Now, for the first time, Brother Ty reveals the secrets he has gleaned from the ancient texts of the monks, and tells how you can get God to be your broker. God Is My Broker is the first truly great self-help business novel. Open this book and open your heart. It will change your life.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Stanislav Ivanov (Narrator)
Audiobook
Dismas sells religious relics to wealthy and influential clients. The Relic Master opens at a relic fair in Basel in 1517 where Dismas searches for items to add to the collections of his two major clients, Frederick the Wise, Elector of Saxony, and soon-to-be Cardinal Albrecht of Mainz. Albrecht, however, cares more for the financial and political benefits of religion and seeks to buy a cardinalship through the selling of indulgences in conjunction with a local monk, Tetzel. When Albrecht’s demands for grander and more marketable relics increase, Dismas and his artist friend Dürer conspire to fabricate a shroud to sell to the unsuspecting noble. When Dürer’s hubris exposes Albrecht’s newly acquired shroud as a fake, Dismas and Dürer set off with a band of Albrecht’s mercenaries to steal the Shroud of Chambéry, Europe’s most venerated relic. On the way to Savoy, where the Shroud will be displayed, they meet a lustful count, a young female apothecary, and nobles on their way to pay homage to the Shroud. It is only when they reach Savoy that they realize they are not the only ones who intend to steal a relic of dubious legitimacy. Set in a time of political and religous upheaval (the death of Holy Roman Emperor Maxmilian I, Martin Luther's 95 Theses, and Leo X's papacy all figure prominently), The Relic Master is a delightful comic adventure.
Christopher Buckley (Author), James Langton (Narrator)
Audiobook
Christopher Buckley at his best: an extraordinary, wide-ranging selection of essays both hilarious and poignant, irreverent and delightful.In his first book of essays since his 1997 bestseller, Wry Martinis, Buckley delivers a rare combination of big ideas and truly fun writing. Tackling subjects ranging from "How to Teach Your Four-Year-Old to Ski" to "A Short History of the Bug Zapper," and "The Art of Sacking" to literary friendships with Joseph Heller and Christopher Hitchens, he is at once a humorous storyteller, astute cultural critic, adventurous traveler, and irreverent historian. Reading these essays is the equivalent of being in the company of a tremendously witty and enlightening companion. Praised as "both deeply informed and deeply funny" by The Wall Street Journal, Buckley will have you laughing and reflecting in equal measure.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Bob Walter (Narrator)
Audiobook
They Eat Puppies, Don't They?: A Novel
In an attempt to gain congressional approval for a top-secret weapons system, Washington lobbyist "Bird" McIntyre teams up with sexy, outspoken neocon Angel Templeton to pit the American public against the Chinese. When Bird fails to uncover an authentic reason to slander the nation, he and Angel put the Washington media machine to work, spreading a rumor that the Chinese secret service is working to assassinate the Dalai Lama. Meanwhile in China, mild-mannered President Fa Mengyao and his devoted aide Gang are maneuvering desperately against sinister party hard-liners Minister Lo and General Han. Now Fa and Gang must convince the world that the People's Republic is not out to kill the Dalai Lama, while maintaining Fa's small margin of power in the increasingly militaristic environment of the party. On the home front, Bird must contend with a high-strung wife who entertains Olympic equestrian ambition, and the qualifying competition happens to be taking place in China. As things unravel abroad, Bird and Angel's lie comes dangerously close to reality. And as their relationship rises to a new level, so do mounting tensions between the United States and China.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Robert Petkoff (Narrator)
Audiobook
In twelve months between 2007 and 2008, Christopher Buckley coped with the passing of his father, William F. Buckley, the father of the modern conservative movement, and his mother, Patricia Taylor Buckley, one of New York's most glamorous and colorful socialites. He was their only child and their relationship was close and complicated. Writes Buckley: "They were not - with respect to every other set of loving, wonderful parents in the world - your typical mom and dad." As Buckley tells the story of their final year together, he takes listners on a surprisingly entertaining tour through hospitals, funeral homes, and memorial services, capturing the heartbreaking and disorienting feeling of becoming a 55-year-old orphan. Buckley maintains his sense of humor by recalling the words of Oscar Wilde: "To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune. To lose both looks like carelessness." Just as Calvin Trillin and Joan Didion gave solace and insight into the experience of losing a spouse, Christopher Buckley offers consolation, wit, and warmth to those coping with the death of a parent, while telling a unique personal story of life with legends.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Christopher Buckley (Narrator)
Audiobook
President of the United States Donald Vanderdamp is having a hell of a time getting his nominees appointed to the Supreme Court. After one nominee is rejected for insufficiently appreciating To Kill A Mockingbird, the president chooses someone so beloved by voters that the Senate won't have the guts to reject her -- Judge Pepper Cartwright, the star of the nation's most popular reality show, Courtroom Six. Will Pepper, a straight-talking Texan, survive a confirmation battle in the Senate? Will becoming one of the most powerful women in the world ruin her love life? And even if she can make it to the Supreme Court, how will she get along with her eight highly skeptical colleagues, including a floundering Chief Justice who, after legalizing gay marriage, learns that his wife has left him for another woman? Soon, Pepper finds herself in the middle of a constitutional crisis, a presidential reelection campaign that the president is determined to lose, and oral arguments of a romantic nature. Supreme Courtship is another classic Christopher Buckley comedy about the Washington institutions most deserving of ridicule.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Anne Heche (Narrator)
Audiobook
In BOOMSDAY, Christopher Buckley envisions the nation's next brouhaha-generational warfare between Baby Boomers and younger Americans who don't want to be stuck paying the bill, and how this conflict provokes the most outlandish presidential campaign ever. Cassandra Devine, a straight-A student, was like any other seventeen-year-old Yale hopeful until was forced to join the army because her father spent her tuition money on a dotcom start-up. Years later, Cassandra has become a Washington spin doctor and blogger who rails against the ""Un-greatest"" generation's mishandling of the Social Security debt. When she learns her father remarried and bought his dim-witted son's way into Yale, she suggests that Baby Boomers be given government incentives to kill themselves by age 75. This proposal catches on with outraged citizens and a senator seeking the youth vote for his presidential bid. With the help of Washington's greatest PR strategist, Cassandra and the senator try to ride the issue of euthanasia to the White House. Their opposition includes the president, who's running for reelection; a pro-life preacher, who may have killed his mother; and, of course Baby Boomers.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Janeane Garofalo (Narrator)
Audiobook
The bestselling author who made mincemeat of political correctness in Thank You for Smoking, conspiracy theories in Little Green Men, and Presidential indiscretions No Way to Treat a First Lady now takes on the hottest topic in the entire world-Arab-American relations-in a blistering comic novel sure to offend the few it doesn't delight. Appalled by the punishment of her rebellious friend Nazrah, youngest and most petulant wife of Prince Bawad of Wasabia, Florence Farfarletti decides to draw a line in the sand. As Deputy to the deputy assistant secretary for Near East Affairs, Florence invents a far-reaching, wide-ranging plan for female emancipation in that part of the world. The U.S. government, of course, tells her to forget it. Publicly, that is. Privately, she's enlisted in a top-secret mission to impose equal rights for the sexes on the small emirate of Matar (pronounced "Mutter"), the "Switzerland of the Persian Gulf." Her crack team: a CIA killer, a snappy PR man, and a brilliant but frustrated gay bureaucrat. Her weapon: TV shows. The lineup on TV Matar includes A Thousand and One Mornings, a daytime talk show that features self-defense tips to be used against boyfriends during Ramadan; an addictive soap opera featuring strangely familiar members of the Matar royal family; and a sitcom about an inept but ruthless squad of religious police, pitched as "Friends from Hell." The result: the first deadly car bombs in the country since 1936, a fatwa against the station's entire staff, a struggle for control of the kingdom, and, of course, interference from the French. And that's only the beginning. A merciless dismantling of both American ineptitude and Arabic intolerance, Florence of Arabia is Christopher Buckley's funniest and most serious novel yet, a biting satire of how U.S. good intentions can cause the Shiite to hit the fan.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Patricia Kalember (Narrator)
Audiobook
The bestselling author who made mincemeat of political correctness in Thank You for Smoking, conspiracy theories in Little Green Men, and Presidential indiscretions No Way to Treat a First Lady now takes on the hottest topic in the entire world-Arab-American relations-in a blistering comic novel sure to offend the few it doesn't delight. Appalled by the punishment of her rebellious friend Nazrah, youngest and most petulant wife of Prince Bawad of Wasabia, Florence Farfarletti decides to draw a line in the sand. As Deputy to the deputy assistant secretary for Near East Affairs, Florence invents a far-reaching, wide-ranging plan for female emancipation in that part of the world. The U.S. government, of course, tells her to forget it. Publicly, that is. Privately, she's enlisted in a top-secret mission to impose equal rights for the sexes on the small emirate of Matar (pronounced "Mutter"), the "Switzerland of the Persian Gulf." Her crack team: a CIA killer, a snappy PR man, and a brilliant but frustrated gay bureaucrat. Her weapon: TV shows. The lineup on TV Matar includes A Thousand and One Mornings, a daytime talk show that features self-defense tips to be used against boyfriends during Ramadan; an addictive soap opera featuring strangely familiar members of the Matar royal family; and a sitcom about an inept but ruthless squad of religious police, pitched as "Friends from Hell." The result: the first deadly car bombs in the country since 1936, a fatwa against the station's entire staff, a struggle for control of the kingdom, and, of course, interference from the French. And that's only the beginning. A merciless dismantling of both American ineptitude and Arabic intolerance, Florence of Arabia is Christopher Buckley's funniest and most serious novel yet, a biting satire of how U.S. good intentions can cause the Shiite to hit the fan.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Carrington Macduffie, Patricia Kalember (Narrator)
Audiobook
No Way to Treat a First Lady: A Novel
Christopher Buckley, the bestselling author of the comic classics The White House Mess and Thank You for Smoking, returns to the funniest place in America: Washington, D.C. Elizabeth Tyler MacMann, the First Lady of the United States, has been charged with killing her philandering husband, the President of the United States. In the midst of a bedroom spat, she allegedly hurled a historic Paul Revere spittoon at him, with tragic results. The attorney general has no choice but to put the First Lady on trial for assassination. The media has never warmed to Beth MacMann (her nickname in the tabloids is "Lady Bethmac"), and as America girds for a scandalous, sensational trial, Beth reaches out to the only defense attorney she trusts, Boyce "Shameless" Baylor, who charges $1,000 an hour and has represented a Who's Who of scoundrels: murderous running backs, society wife-killers, Los Alamos spies, and national-security sellouts. Why Boyce Baylor? Because Beth loved him once, when they were law students. Boyce wanted to marry her, but Beth chose the future President instead. Now, after all these years, Boyce has a second chance. To what lengths will a shameless lawyer go to win the Trial of the Millennium and regain the love of his life? Buckley has been described by the Los Angeles Times Book Review as "one of the best and surest political humorists in America" and by Entertainment Weekly as "a superb writer of politically incorrect satire." No Way to Treat a First Lady is flat-out hilarious. And furthermore, it's a love story for our time.
Christopher Buckley (Author), Tim Matheson (Narrator)
Audiobook
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